Monday, July 16, 2007

Penises And Food

Last Friday, some co-workers and I went to a restaurant in Venice for lunch. It was on the company dime, so I was reading the menu more intently than usual, wanting to get the most out of someone else's buck. Hmm, chicken wrap sounds good. Let's see what's in it...

"Chicken Breast..." Love chicken, love breasts, sounds tasty.
"Avocado and Tomato..." Yes, and yes.
"With Cummin-Yogurt Sauce." Um, what? Cummin-yogurt sauce?

Wait, no, I'm sorry. That's not quite what I was in the mood for... I'd like some of your seared tuna covered in jizz-tartar gravy please. Or actually, could I try the tossed Greek salad with a side of extra virgin man-juice mayonnaise? Seriously, there's gotta be a more appetizing way to describe that chicken wrap! Anyway, later, I checked Wikipedia, which informed me that it's a type of spice called cumin that is often misspelled cummin. So, now I know. And knowing is half the battle. Then, I closed the browser, opened up some porn, and made me some real, home-made.. hey-oh!

Wow, sorry about that. Uh, but speaking of penises and food (smooth transition)...

Patton Oswalt. The dude loves to talk about both. This made me laugh last week:

If you haven't before, definitely check out his stand-up. Also check out his other appearance on Conan:

And since we love laughter on our iPods as well, here are two tracks from his new album, Werewolves And Lollipops, purchase via the links below:
"America Has Spoken" - Patton Oswalt [buy album]
"Great Food Is Cooked By Psychos" - Patton Oswalt [buy album]

He's also the voice of Remy, the rat in Ratatouille, which I have not seen yet, because I was too busy wasting my money on Transformers. Next post: Summer Movie Reviews.. which will include my review of the much-anticipated comedy, Superbad (p.s. while we're mentioning late night apperances, check out Michael Cera on Letterman).

Hope everyone has a good Monday, leave a comment!


Anonymous J. said...

ratatouille was great! i didn't know patton oswalt is so funny! and have you considered stand-up?

2:22 AM  
Blogger Laura. said...

Patton Oswalt is absolutely hysterical. He had me in tears in the first clip. Thanks for the laughs!

9:29 AM  
Blogger NYOne said...

My philosophy on life is that free food tastes better, with or without unfortunately-named sauces. Hope whatever you got was good.
I have loved Patton Oswalt since he hosted some weird late-night show on Comedy Central, with...Marc...something with the glasses? Marc Maron? Am I thinking of two separate shows?
Sorry to be so random. Happy Monday!

9:34 AM  
Blogger Marc said...

waiting to hear what you thought about Transformers

10:02 AM  
Anonymous Jessica said...

Hey Captain,
I've really been missing my number one source of music (TV shows like Greys and The OC ... through you), so I was wondering if you were planning a new playlist or anything soon - hopefully with OC type music. Or even if you can recommend some artists to check out, because I listen to my iPod all day at work and need some new stuff on it.

11:03 AM  
Blogger Laura. said...

How about a summer playlist? =]

4:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have you seen Patton Oswalt on Reno 911? Either as the Dungeons and Dragons guy who takes the game a little too seriously, or as the Renaissance Faire guy who...takes the Renaissance Faire a little too seriously (although I'm sure anyone who attends one is very sincere about it). Hilarious.

7:17 PM  
Blogger Captain Oats said...

Hey J,
Glad to hear Ratatouille was fun, I def will check it out when I find someone to go with me. Or else it'll just be creepy for a 25 yo male to go to a kids movie alone...

Hey laura.,
He is one of the funniest men out there right now.

Hey NYOne,
Free food is one of my favorite things in this world. Right behind free drinks. Hmm, I'm not sure which Comedy Central thing you're talking about... but I love randomness.

Hi Marc... Maron? Jk.
Thoughts forthcoming, what did you think?

Hey jessica,
I have a few playlist ideas, but they just take up so much dang time! =) I'll get my act together tho.. promise.

Hello laura.,
I like it. I'll add it to the list... I also have wedding songs (since there seems to be a lot of weddings coming up), making out songs, sex songs, and vegas songs....

Hey Anon 7:17,
I've never gotten into Reno 911 sadly. It's on my list of things to do along with the above playlists. =)

9:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ratatouille was awesome:) it was so funny

9:35 PM  
Blogger Jin said...

to the intro story... wow. its great to have a younger brother. oh waiiit...

and you need to go see ratatouille. my showing was sold out - with no one under the age of like 18. i think it's better w/o the screaming children.

5:23 PM  
Blogger Captain Oats said...

Hi Anon 9:35,
I will def have to check that out soon!

Hey Jin,
Ha. Ha. Ha.

6:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hwaaa! I loooove Patton Oswalt.

3:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

your not the only one..! i still haven't watched Ratatouille yet!

6:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Seeing Transformers over Ratatouille speaks volumes of the kind of write you'll be.

7:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

^writer...just so you don't quibble with my spelling.

7:56 AM  
Blogger Laura. said...

I am eagerly anticipating the next iPod roulette, I must say. Not sure why.

*returns to 4th listen of the phenomenal new Air Traffic album*

P.S. Sonny - My goal to see The Fratellis has been fulfilled (rather, it will be) - they open for The Police with Fiction Plane in August! =]

1:56 PM  
Anonymous Dom said...

Hey Cap'n,

Just thought I'd let you know that under your "You Should Watch" section, the Twin Peaks picture links to The Shield website, and The Shield picture links to a Smallville Website.

Pointing this out is proof that I spend way too much time visiting this site. But keep on bloggin', and I'll keep on reading.

7:25 AM  
Anonymous Dom said...

Ok, this might come across a tad obsessive, but the following links under "You Should Watch" are either dead or now unrelated to the show...

-Freaks and Geeks
-Veronica Mars
-The OC

On the topic, I don't get why TV networks remove websites for shows after they've ended/been cancelled. Seems a bit rude, if you ask me, like trying to forget about a child that died. I guess it's probably because they're usually the ones that held the pillow over its face while the poor child struggled for air...

Also, I have no segway for the following question, but are you a Harry Potter fan? Cause you seem like a Harry Potter fan...

7:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

random comment: the way your myspace lists your representation for 05 and 06, and then starting 4/07 it just says "screenwriter", it makes it sound like your agent and manager both dropped you this spring. if that is the case, i'm not sure i understand why that's something you'd want to advertise.

2:05 PM  
Blogger Marc said...

Went to go see Transformers with a few drinks under my belt. Worked out very nicely. It was good for what I thought it was going to be. Just upset about some of the fighting scenes. It was hard to determine who was who. (maybe b/c of the drinks???) Overall, not so bad. Nice light summer movie with some friends.
.....looking forward to seeing spider pig

1:51 PM  
Anonymous Erica said...

OK seriously, no joke, I have heard the cumin/cummin mix-up before.
I was auditioning actors to play a chef in my film project, so each auditioner read some sides for us. Now, this one guy came in and acted like a complete psycho. He took the character's slightly nervous, OCD-y tendencies and blew them up Michael Bay-style. And then while reading his monologue, he said:
"I prefer cummin myself."

Yeah. I know.

6:59 PM  

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